Again - so very long!!

In the last 7 weeks my work life has changed enormously. It went from fearfully perilous to comfortably efficient. On June 3, the parent company I work for laid off half of their staff and cut our portion of the company off from any financial assistance. It changed everything. The place I hoped I would work until I no longer worked changed. It was no longer safe and secure. It went from being a family to being a job. I went from having a home away from home to an office again. I know it was supposed to be that way. Maybe God saw that I was becoming too comfortable and relying too much on that ease. It changed and so I began looking at things different. And things became very different. No longer was there an odd supervisory relationship between me and several EIP employees. Where there was once an authority exerted over me to establish the hierarchy, now there was no support at all. It was disappointing. But Joel was back to being my direct boss. Over these last few weeks, we've re-established our close relationship. He's sought my help with decisions and I've renewed my respect for the way he's been handling things - calmly and with a level rational head. He's been encouraging and grateful. And I've made sure that he knows that I'm here until they tell me to go.

I no longer have someone to back me up if I had a day off. So when I found out that EIP was working 8-4 shifts which I couldn't take advantage of, I asked Joel to let me work from home. He agreed and before the end of last month I was working from home. It's been a balancing act. I think I'm doing okay for the time being but balance has never been my thing. I feel like I've been getting a lot done at work and home is benefitting too.

So now I'm back. Lots of other things have happened over that time. Good stuff. Growing stuff. But that will wait. I'll catch this up soon enough now that life is back to strange normal..... :)

Long time no write!

I can't pinpoint the exact reason I haven't been updating. Not entirely certain. It seems that we've been pretty busy - but I'm not so sure about that either. But here's some updates for ya!

- Preparing for a giant birthday bash at Iron City Church on Sunday!
Our numbers are due for a burst at ICC and we're praying that God finds us ready for a crowd on Sunday! When you sit down and list some of the things that have happened to the core of ICC over the last - oh - 6-8 months, its pretty clear that the enemy isn't happy with what we're doing at ICC and wants us to bail. Deaths in the family and serious illness have hit our church family hard. And particularly so this week. But I was talking to Bob and over the last 8 months we lost Nana and have experienced some serious financial hardship - but our relationship with our Saviour has brought peace that makes it truly full of joy rather than sadness and depression. And He's brought an amazing group of people into our world that allow us a support that neither of us would have thought possible. Pray for God to bring those who need Him to us and give us the words and message. Bob and I sat at the ICC table on Sunday at McCandless Days and talked to a pretty big number of folks about ICC. As the most unlikely of marketers :) we are really hoping we'll see some familiar faces Sunday. We've been participating in semi-weekly meetings with church for planning all these big events too - so maybe we are busier than normal!

- The ICC Worship Band has been sounding AWESOME!!
We had a rocky time for a while - adjusting to the new roles in the band. But it kind of came to a crisis point and since then - we have really come together as a team to sound great for the glory of God!! This last week, I just had a blast praising God. Shhhhhh don't tell anyone but I swear this former Presbyterian nearly raised her hands in praise :) Soon - I tell you - it's coming.

- Every once in awhile you know God puts someone special in your life.
Betty at Trinity Orthopedics is one of those people. I don't always talk to her. A couple times a week. And before we talk, I can't be sure I was thinking of God - but I can tell you that after I ALWAYS am. She is such a testimony for Christ. Loving, kind, and gentle spirited. And so very ready to shine like crazy for Him. Reminds me that I should be making sure that I've not got a basket over my light. I love that God puts her in my day as a reminder of what I should be. Thank you.

- Watching brothers.
Last week our friend Michael took us out to dinner for crablegs. So anyone who knows us knows that this was a HUGE treat!! Bob never goes out to dinner unless its a family thing. And he grumbled a bit but gave in because Michael is like a brother to him. What a total mess we all three were! And I wasn't all that good at it either :) Michael supplemented my meager pickings with whole strips of crabmeat obtained with the ease of a professional. I love him but it was infuriating :) Anyway, he had purchased a gift certificate for Bob for his one year birthday as a brother in the Family of God and gave it to Bob as we finished up dinner. I can't begin to tell you how awesome it is to know that he has such a good friend. Michael is a good guy who's been through stuff just like Bob and it's just awesome that God has blessed both of us with his friendship. And it's an honor to be there for him as he goes through stuff in his own personal life.

- Coming up on 6 weeks SMOKE FREE!
I have now been nicotine free for 2 full weeks. It isn't always pretty and I can tell I'm still a bit crabby but it is a HUGE thing. And mostly all good. I need some serious prayer about not substituting eating for it but I like not smoking. It's definitely an awesome thing that God has given me the strength to conquer. I know it's not done. I'll be fighting the desire for the rest of my natural life and even if I sometimes want one like crazy I like not being a smoker way more......

New job description

After 3 1/2 years as a radiology practice manager, I might just put in for a new job title - Crap tunnel. Some might think I'm complaining to request a title like that. And maybe 2 years ago it was a complaint. But now it's an opportunity to thank the One who is responsible for my attitude shift. I am indeed a crap tunnel. The doctors shoot it out and others sling it back, not AT me but through me - back and forth.

For the first two years, my tunnel was really ugly. I let lot of that poo stick inside me - I took it personally. But in another of the oxymorons of the Living God, I started giving in to Him and He started working on an career enhancement that I would have never thought possible - a silicone lining. And for the first time, being a poo tunnel wasn't something I was humiliated or upset about being. God worked something in me that I CLEARLY COULD NOT DO WITHOUT HIM. I remember an old co-worker Tom used to say, "Be a duck." Let things just roll off you. Well!! I never!!!! And that's the truth - I could NEVER. But what I can't do God can. I love my job and although there are times when I falter, He's shown me how to recover when I fall. And so, even then - no crappy build up:)

If I'm honest, this wasn't my life-long goal - in charge of little and with little decision making ability of my own. But I have absolutely no regrets and again - I love my job. Not for what it is but for what God's used it to do to me. AND allowed me to enjoy!

Answered Prayer

I should not be in the least bit surprised and yet ……

More than a month ago ART’s only other administrative employee quit. Better opportunity for her. Since I’m it, I would say that initially I was on the verge of panic. Thoughts of late hours, total overwhelm and burn out streaming through my head. This was it in the first ten minutes. Then a wash of calm came over me. I prayed that God would help me to handle things and I remembered that He never gives you more than you can handle. And in the weeks since then, I am astonished at how powerfully He has worked. I’ve had help from my friend Carrie. She’s been here 3 days a week for at least the mornings and once a few additional IT things change, I think I’ll be able to let her go back to working with EIP all except Monday mornings. It’s amazing – faith and peace….

Volume has been relatively low (which wasn't my hope) but call volume is way down and radiologist independence is at an all time high despite both of them squirming at the thoughts of that. And so my calm has been so great! I love talking to clients again. Love to help them through problems. That was one of my concerns. I remembered before that I hated getting calls because I was so stressed that I saw everything as an inconvenience. I prayed because I needed God’s help to NOT turn back into that ugly stress monster. I wanted to be here what I am in the rest of my life – optimistic and happy!!!

And I have it!!! God truly gave me the strength to manage the panic and then the rest followed. Let me remember this next time my first instinct is to freak out…. Someone please remind me! Father let this lesson stay in the front of my cranial rolodex!

Real people

I've been slowly realizing something about myself lately. I have long had a problem with authority. I think a lot of it stems from my own insecurity. I don't like to be wrong because I don't like to disappoint people or feel stupid. It's not just work - lately it's been everywhere I turn. Something seems to have boiled up to the surface lately that clearly God wants me to think about and put into practice.

I react the way I do because I presume to think people are thinking less of me. I'm sure part of this is that God wants me to NOT be so insecure - but I'm not quite there yet. However, what seems to really help is finding a way to connect with them as just people. Real people are rarely out to get me or make me feel horrible or humiliate. Every time situations have gotten the best of me, I've been reminded that the people involved don't react that way because of me. They have their own agenda and it rarely involves me. It isn't all about me. And when I'm able to talk with people I've uncovered that their motives or frustrations or just decisions are their own and how they do things is a result of their own baggage, it helps. Sometimes talking with them about something completely personal helps resolve the issue I had trouble with - sometimes not. But at least by the time its all done, I've realized that it really wasn't anything about me.

Sometimes God must shake His head and smile that it takes me so long to get stuff he tells me...... :)