Being Blessed vs. Being a Blessing

Last week before the proverbial doo-doo hit the fan, I heard a message from one of the online churches I listen to. It was an amazing lesson delivered by a guy that seriously looked like he was about 12, but wow, what a power packed message. It hit me hard and this was BEFORE I got a really rough message from God. The basic message was this: we set all these goals for ourselves spiritually and if we are honest, we want God to bless our socks off over attaining them. But what if, that was only half the story. What if OUR TRUE GOAL as a Christ-follower is to BE a BLESSING. Seriously, I follow Jesus for a number of different reasons and He knows that most of them are self interested at heart. But the older I get, the more I realize that isn't the end.

I had the wonderful opportunity two weeks ago to reunite with an old friend that I have not seen since 1987. Before this message I couldn't figure out why I was so filled with remorse after seeing her. Then I heard this message and it was clear. For SO LONG, I didn't regret anything in my life - and I SAID it was because I knew the things that I did, even if wrong, made me into the person I am today. Ugh. Even typing that now is painful. There was little consideration for the pain and anguish I had caused A BUNCH of people in my life who did NOTHING to deserve it. I was focused on my growth goals.

And so I thought upon my friendship with Beth. She was absolutely wonderful to me - kind and thoughtful gifts like the picture of the baby because she knew I wanted to be a mom so much (which is weird because I don't remember that) and writing a speech about how much she'd miss me to give in English. She even told me about one that I didn't know. She gave Bo money to buy me a VanHalen tshirt at the concert. And here's the rub. I was NEVER as good to her as she deserved. SHE was a blessing to me. I had no designs on BEING a blessing to her. What an abyssmal picture that painted.

And then last week's catastrophic humbling happened and I realized I wasn't being a blessing to a lot of people. I was looking for them to bless me and encourage me and make me feel special (God included) and I was decidedly NOT being purposeful about BEING a blessing to them.

The pastor delivering the message suggested that we create some BLESSING GOALS for ourselves and I think for me, that is LONG OVERDUE. I probably need to start small so here's three for me until the end of the year:

1. Be intentional in my words and be encouraging with my church family. If the words aren't encouraging or building up, don't say them.

2. Show that I value people in my life by LISTENING IN LOVE.

3. When there are opportunities to bless others even at the risk of my inconvenience, MAKE the decision that will glorify God - BLESS THEM.