Kind of an Earthquake of Change

It's only been a bit less than a week and I don't even know where to begin. Bob resigned as worship leader last Sunday and I was in a verbal jousting match with a virtual stranger that end up skewering my vocals to the point it has me needing to take a break from singing so I can adjust.

Sounds simple until you factor in one part - God's people (including me and Bob) can royally (pun intended) screw up His plans. Let me just say that no one involved skirts fault in this - we all have our signature sins stamped all over it. No excuses but we were all up to our eyeballs in doing other things that some of the important stuff wasn't attended to. I've laughed at this over the last two years but ICC's sign, More Jesus Less Crap was what drew us. But it hadn't even launched then - so it was still true. Two years later, there's plenty of crap. God didn't design it as part of the church, we carried it in - on our shoes, in our purses, on our backs, when we walked in the door.

I'm tired over it but things are getting clearer. My schedule is actually absurdly free this week and so is Bob's. He took Friday off and I actually caught him reading a FICTION book out in the livingroom!!!! We both desperately needed the time off but would never have taken it to this degree.

So this morning we are going to check out another church. We'll probably check out a bunch of them over the course of the next couple of months. And then hopefully, God will have healed some broken hearts and some conversations will have taken place, and we'll go back to a place we feel like is home.

This week I was reminded that such a painful thing is part of how God grows us. And a good friend and a very wise woman sat across from me practically giddy with excitement about what God intended for us through such a painful experience. And I remembered that during one of the Beth Moore studies, I remembered learning about "Joy cometh in the morning." Such darkness - some of it even brought on by bad decisions and unfortunate choices and sinful actions that I chose - led to the night that was 2005. But joy came in the morning - it was all part of the path that led to ICC and a Subway in 2007. And I wished so desperately that I had known during that night that joy comes in the morning. And I wanted to remember. And until Thursday when I sat with my friend, I'd forgotten. Right now this hurts and there are regrets and disappointment but joy cometh in the morning, for me and Bob and ICC and everyone involved.